"I fled Him down the nights and down the days. I fled him down the arches of the years. I fled him down the labyrinthine ways of my own mind ..."
"As the deer pants for the waterbrooks, so pants my soul after thee O God. My soul thirsts for God for the Living God!"
How can both of these be true at the same time? How can I be both running after God and running from Him simultaneously? Even in high school I chose these two quotes as the quotes that most described my life. And now here I find myself in my 60's and still running from Him and to Him. This blog epitimizes this as it has been many months since I promised myself to write regularly and failed to do so. By His grace I will begin again to follow after Him and cease to run from Him.
Lord, may You catch me again and hold me close to your cross!
Monday, February 22, 2010
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Our sufferings are Christ's sufferings
I Thessalonians 2:14-15
Our sufferings are His sufferings and the church's sufferings and the sufferings of the righteous throughout history.
In this section Paul makes a direct comparison between the sufferings of the Thessalonians from their countrymen with the sufferings of Christians in other places with the sufferings of Christ with the sufferings of the prophets. Why does this matter? I think that when we were suffering in China because of persecution from another American teacher, from the inquiries of the government and from serious illness that we were often tempted to wonder why the rest of Christians, especially those in the US, could get by with so little suffering. We understood that our sufferings were in some small way completing the sufferings of Christ for a fallen world, but I don't think that I ever thought of the cross as a central point around which all suffering for righteousness sake clustered for all of human history. That is, I did not feel when I was lying on a narrow gurney in a local Chinese clinic getting an IV by multiple shots twice a day instead of by bag to try to avoid infection, that somehow this connected in any specific way to the prophets of old or the ancient Church through the Cross. But this is the way I see this passage as presenting it. All suffering for the cause of Christ connects together through the cross.
Thank you, Lord, for taking all my suffering on Yourself, so that the little I have suffered is tied eternally to You through the Cross.
Our sufferings are His sufferings and the church's sufferings and the sufferings of the righteous throughout history.
In this section Paul makes a direct comparison between the sufferings of the Thessalonians from their countrymen with the sufferings of Christians in other places with the sufferings of Christ with the sufferings of the prophets. Why does this matter? I think that when we were suffering in China because of persecution from another American teacher, from the inquiries of the government and from serious illness that we were often tempted to wonder why the rest of Christians, especially those in the US, could get by with so little suffering. We understood that our sufferings were in some small way completing the sufferings of Christ for a fallen world, but I don't think that I ever thought of the cross as a central point around which all suffering for righteousness sake clustered for all of human history. That is, I did not feel when I was lying on a narrow gurney in a local Chinese clinic getting an IV by multiple shots twice a day instead of by bag to try to avoid infection, that somehow this connected in any specific way to the prophets of old or the ancient Church through the Cross. But this is the way I see this passage as presenting it. All suffering for the cause of Christ connects together through the cross.
Thank you, Lord, for taking all my suffering on Yourself, so that the little I have suffered is tied eternally to You through the Cross.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Abolishing death
"God's own purpose ... has been revealed by the appearing of our Savior Christ Jesus, who has abolished death and brought life and immortality to light through the gospel." II Time 1: 9-10
What a statement: God's purpose was revealed through Jesus and abolished death! For the past several years I have been sick a lot and sometimes seemed near death, so somehow the thought that the purpose of God in Jesus was to abolish death is especially dear to me. If I abolish something, I forbid it to occur or be. So God forbade death. He said, "It's got to stop!!!" The alienation from God must end forever! What amazing good news. But He did not stop there. He not only ended death, but also brought life and immortality. So, maybe the absence of death would have seemed good enough to us, but it was not good enough to Him. In His love for us He enabled me to have full, eternal life with Him. That is an amazing trade, to remove the greatest curse of the ages and place the ageless and greatest blessing on me.
Father, help me to live today in the full light of your life. Help my life to reveal the end of death and the ageless life to the world around me.
What a statement: God's purpose was revealed through Jesus and abolished death! For the past several years I have been sick a lot and sometimes seemed near death, so somehow the thought that the purpose of God in Jesus was to abolish death is especially dear to me. If I abolish something, I forbid it to occur or be. So God forbade death. He said, "It's got to stop!!!" The alienation from God must end forever! What amazing good news. But He did not stop there. He not only ended death, but also brought life and immortality. So, maybe the absence of death would have seemed good enough to us, but it was not good enough to Him. In His love for us He enabled me to have full, eternal life with Him. That is an amazing trade, to remove the greatest curse of the ages and place the ageless and greatest blessing on me.
Father, help me to live today in the full light of your life. Help my life to reveal the end of death and the ageless life to the world around me.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Freely give us all things
"He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all–how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?" Romans 8:32
I have been meditating on this verse this past week as amazing things have happened over and over. The Lord has blessed us with several major financial blessings, but best of all He has used these and other things to reach out to a person from another culture and religious background. As this person has seen our God and Father working miracles in our lives, one of which she was involved with, she has been encouraged to ask questions that have allowed me to share Jesus with her.
What a God! Somehow, when these things started to happen, I thought they were to encourage me, and I am sure they were. But as the week developed, it became clear that they were also for her. This is the God I serve: a God who can work good for everyone at the same time, a God who shows His love to those who believe and to those who do not, and a God who answers prayers, even ones we did not know specifically how to ask for!
I have been meditating on this verse this past week as amazing things have happened over and over. The Lord has blessed us with several major financial blessings, but best of all He has used these and other things to reach out to a person from another culture and religious background. As this person has seen our God and Father working miracles in our lives, one of which she was involved with, she has been encouraged to ask questions that have allowed me to share Jesus with her.
What a God! Somehow, when these things started to happen, I thought they were to encourage me, and I am sure they were. But as the week developed, it became clear that they were also for her. This is the God I serve: a God who can work good for everyone at the same time, a God who shows His love to those who believe and to those who do not, and a God who answers prayers, even ones we did not know specifically how to ask for!
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Memorial Day
"For whenever you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord's death until he comes." I Corinthians 11:26
We have been traveling over the Memorial Day weekend, and as I determined to meditate daily on the cross, I found myself meditating on Memorial Day more than usual. Like most Americans, I see Memorial Day as the official beginning of summer, a day for travel, picnics, friends and family, not really a day to remember war dead. Somehow the whole idea of remembering the war dead seems a bit macabre, so I find it easier to avoid thinking about it at any length.
As I faced this for the first time at least consciously, I realized that this is the same thing I have been doing with the cross of Christ. Yet, Paul in Corinthians seems to suggest that the death of Jesus on the cross is something to be proclaimed. When I take communion, I tend to focus on the personal - that is, on my salvation - more than on the Lord's sacrifice. I feel a warm feeling of resting in His love, but I rarely think of this time as a proclamation. A proclamation seems to me to be anything but warm and fuzzy. In this situation it is a bold statement of what God has done - JESUS CHRIST DIED ON THE CROSS TO SAVE SINNERS!
Help me, Father God, to boldly proclaim the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, to embrace the very essential deathness of Your gift, to never hide from the baldness of truth behind a fuzzy warm feeling of affection for such a terrible sacrifice!
We have been traveling over the Memorial Day weekend, and as I determined to meditate daily on the cross, I found myself meditating on Memorial Day more than usual. Like most Americans, I see Memorial Day as the official beginning of summer, a day for travel, picnics, friends and family, not really a day to remember war dead. Somehow the whole idea of remembering the war dead seems a bit macabre, so I find it easier to avoid thinking about it at any length.
As I faced this for the first time at least consciously, I realized that this is the same thing I have been doing with the cross of Christ. Yet, Paul in Corinthians seems to suggest that the death of Jesus on the cross is something to be proclaimed. When I take communion, I tend to focus on the personal - that is, on my salvation - more than on the Lord's sacrifice. I feel a warm feeling of resting in His love, but I rarely think of this time as a proclamation. A proclamation seems to me to be anything but warm and fuzzy. In this situation it is a bold statement of what God has done - JESUS CHRIST DIED ON THE CROSS TO SAVE SINNERS!
Help me, Father God, to boldly proclaim the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, to embrace the very essential deathness of Your gift, to never hide from the baldness of truth behind a fuzzy warm feeling of affection for such a terrible sacrifice!
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
The Determinate Plan of God
"this Man, delivered over by the predetermined plan and foreknowledge of God, you nailed to a cross by the hands of godless men and put Him to death. Acts 2:23
I wonder what it was like to know the cause and arrangements for your death for an eternity. Somehow I had never thought of this passage from God's perspective before. In the past I have thought of it from my perspective. That is, I would get sort of a chill-thrill at the thought that God had planned my salvation before any of my ancestors were born.
But today I was struck by the realization that God the Father had to live with the certainty of His Son's death for eternity past. And God the Son had to live with the realization that He would face the ultimate punishment for sin, even though sin had never even been in or on Him. And the Holy Spirit would have to face a separation within the Godhead. OK, so I don't have any concept of how an Eternal God experiences the passage of time, but this passage says that this was PREdetermined and FOREknown, so therefore there must be some sort of time involved. Did God the Father feel dread; did the Son go through the stages of grief; did the Holy Spirit of God wonder what it would be like for the Godhead to experience such separation? I have always considered it a blessing that I do not know when or how I will die. But God did not have that. He knew.
I cannot know fully the answers to these questions. But I do know that Jesus "endured" the cross, that He "despised shame". So at least to the Man Jesus, this was not an easy solution. Was it also hard for the Godhead in anticipation of the event as well as during it?
What is my response? Lord, I love You for taking my place there on the cross, for bearing all my guilt. Help me to be amazed each day at Your love, Your grace, Your goodness as I meditate on the cross!
I wonder what it was like to know the cause and arrangements for your death for an eternity. Somehow I had never thought of this passage from God's perspective before. In the past I have thought of it from my perspective. That is, I would get sort of a chill-thrill at the thought that God had planned my salvation before any of my ancestors were born.
But today I was struck by the realization that God the Father had to live with the certainty of His Son's death for eternity past. And God the Son had to live with the realization that He would face the ultimate punishment for sin, even though sin had never even been in or on Him. And the Holy Spirit would have to face a separation within the Godhead. OK, so I don't have any concept of how an Eternal God experiences the passage of time, but this passage says that this was PREdetermined and FOREknown, so therefore there must be some sort of time involved. Did God the Father feel dread; did the Son go through the stages of grief; did the Holy Spirit of God wonder what it would be like for the Godhead to experience such separation? I have always considered it a blessing that I do not know when or how I will die. But God did not have that. He knew.
I cannot know fully the answers to these questions. But I do know that Jesus "endured" the cross, that He "despised shame". So at least to the Man Jesus, this was not an easy solution. Was it also hard for the Godhead in anticipation of the event as well as during it?
What is my response? Lord, I love You for taking my place there on the cross, for bearing all my guilt. Help me to be amazed each day at Your love, Your grace, Your goodness as I meditate on the cross!
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Day 2 on the Cross Way
"this Man, delivered over by the predetermined plan and foreknowledge of God, you nailed to a cross by the hands of godless men and put Him to death. Acts 2:23
"The predetermined plan" of God. The cross was no accident. But my approach to life is pretty accidental most of the time. That is, I tend to be spontaneous and will do just about anything on the spur of the moment. Once our family was driving to New England for a vacation and before we had gone three miles, I had suggested camping at Assageague Island along the way, even though Assateague was hours out of the way. That was 2 days after we had decided to go to NE instead of Florida. Another time we "stopped by" New Jersey on our way home to the Midwest from Florida. Still another time we (two adults and a teenager) camped out in our subcompact car on a mountain in France because we had neglected to make reservations for a hotel the first weekend in August. Now, here's the problem: Although we love the adventures that my impulsiveness provides, I have come to realize that spontaneity in seeking God is just not working well.
So for years I read through the Bible faithfully; starting again as soon as I finished. Ah, DISCIPLINE! But that got boring and I realized that my intimacy with my loving Father was suffering. So then I started reading one passage until I got as much as possible out of that. Some days I would read one verse or one phrase only and meditate on it. That helped for awhile, but eventually, once again I found that it was a chore, rather than a delight. So next I tried saying to myself, "Bible reading and time with the Lord is not a chore to be accomplished, so I will try skipping days so that my time with the Lord is spontaneous." Well, all I can say is that I think my Enemy liked that one a lot, because I found myself spending less and less time with my Lord.
This blog is my next step. I realized that if God planned the crucifixion from the ages past, then He values planning and goal setting. So I am going to commit myself to writing once a day and posting thoughts on the cross for a year. I will meditate on at least one passage per day and report here on my progress.
"The predetermined plan" of God. The cross was no accident. But my approach to life is pretty accidental most of the time. That is, I tend to be spontaneous and will do just about anything on the spur of the moment. Once our family was driving to New England for a vacation and before we had gone three miles, I had suggested camping at Assageague Island along the way, even though Assateague was hours out of the way. That was 2 days after we had decided to go to NE instead of Florida. Another time we "stopped by" New Jersey on our way home to the Midwest from Florida. Still another time we (two adults and a teenager) camped out in our subcompact car on a mountain in France because we had neglected to make reservations for a hotel the first weekend in August. Now, here's the problem: Although we love the adventures that my impulsiveness provides, I have come to realize that spontaneity in seeking God is just not working well.
So for years I read through the Bible faithfully; starting again as soon as I finished. Ah, DISCIPLINE! But that got boring and I realized that my intimacy with my loving Father was suffering. So then I started reading one passage until I got as much as possible out of that. Some days I would read one verse or one phrase only and meditate on it. That helped for awhile, but eventually, once again I found that it was a chore, rather than a delight. So next I tried saying to myself, "Bible reading and time with the Lord is not a chore to be accomplished, so I will try skipping days so that my time with the Lord is spontaneous." Well, all I can say is that I think my Enemy liked that one a lot, because I found myself spending less and less time with my Lord.
This blog is my next step. I realized that if God planned the crucifixion from the ages past, then He values planning and goal setting. So I am going to commit myself to writing once a day and posting thoughts on the cross for a year. I will meditate on at least one passage per day and report here on my progress.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)